Meeting Malfoy
by callmeGreen-Eyes
Summary: what is a teenage muggle to do when she opens the fridge and is suddenly sent off to hogwarts? find hottie extraordinaire draco malfoy, of course! but what happens when you fall in love with him, what happens when you have to go home? COMPLETE
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I own nothing but the story! And I'm definately not writing this on top of every chapter so this is the one time. Deal with it.

**Chapter 1: Bright Lights and Big Surprises**

"Shayna simply _adores_ Draco Malfoy, Slytherin extraordinaire," Kelli laughed.Kelli andIwere hanging out with our neighbor, Tom. We were talking with Tom's mother, Barb, about boys. Well, it was really me and Kelli talking. Tom just sat there being the pushover that he is.

I'm just your average 17-year-old girl. I've got long, light brown hair and blue-ish-gray eyes that Kelli says can really catch your attention. I've got both glasses and contacts, but I prefer my glasses, so I've usually got those on. Kelli is also very average. With hair a few inches shorter than mine but nearly the same color, many people think we are sisters. It's an easy mistake. Kelli and I have been best friends for eleven years, so long that we act alike when near each other. Tom is the little neighbor boy, even though he is our age. Only the lord knows what color his hair is, because it's always greasy. Not in a Severus Snape way, it just was. Some genetic thing or something.

Anyway, this is where my story starts. Kelli, Tom, Barb and I were all sitting outside around the fire pit talking about boys. And Kelli was currently making fun of my Draco Malfoy fetish.

"I do not _adore _him. I just think he's incredibly hot," I retorted. Yes, it's true. I love Malfoy.

"Yuck." Kelli's face showed how she thought of the blonde's looks. Disgusting. "I don't know how you can think that, he's such a horrible person. For crying out loud, his father's a Death Eater, and he'll probably be one too!" Tom and Barb both laughed, realizing what geeks Kelli and I are.

"So? He's still hot." There is no way anyone can change my mind. Malfoy is undoubtedly_the_hottest Harry Potter character.

"Whatever Shayna, you keep on thinking that," Kelli replied, giving up.

"Ok, I will." Everyone smiled. "I'm gonna go get a pop, anyone want one?"

"I'll take one please!" Kelli said enthusiastically before chasing after Harley, Tom's dog.

"I just got one," Tom said, holding up his already half-empty can. I yelled ok to Kelli and walked off to the garage, where Tom's family keeps the pop.

When I opened the fridge, something happened. This huge light exploded in my face, and knocked me flat on my butt. I was totally at a loss as to what was happening. I couldn't even see the garage anymore; I was just surrounded by this light. The I felt like I was moving, fast. It seemed as though I was traveling thousands of miles per minute. I was kind of getting scared. I mean, wouldn't you be scared?

Then everything stopped. I was at the edge of an average-sized lake, still sitting on my butt. Looking to my right I saw this really creepy forest. It reminded me of the Forbidden Forest. Pff, I would never go in there willingly, that's for sure. At my left there was more trees, but I wouldn't call it a forest. There was a huge stadium behind the trees, and I mean HUGE. The stands were all raised, and there were three large hoops at each end of the field.

"That looks like a…. no, impossible, Quidditch doesn't exist. Neither do Quidditch stadiums." Whatever I said, that looking alarmingly like a Quidditch stadium.

I looked back at the lake as I finally stood up. There were tentacles skimming the top, giant tentacles, as though belonging to a…

"Giant squid…"

Oh my god. Was I at Hogwarts?

I spun around, praying that I was and praying that I wasn't about to see Hogwarts. If I really was there…that would be so cool! But I would be in England! I am not a witch, and I would be stuck in the one place muggles should _not_ be. How would I get home?

The first thing I saw was a hut and couple hundred yards away from me. Hagrid's cabin. There was even a garden by it. Great.

(Note the sarcasm)

And finally, there was this gigantic castle looming up in front of me. It was gorgeous. Sure, there was barely any light coming from the sky cause, hello, its night, but I could still see it. Hogwarts.

Holy sht. I'm at Hogwarts.


	2. Chapter 2

(A/N: thank you to siriusblackk and monkeygirl1292 who reviewed faster than I thought anyone would and much boosted my confidence in this story!)

WARnInG: THIS CHAPTER COnTAInS HALF-SWEAR-WORDS. YOU WERE WARnED.

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**Chapter 2: Dirty Thoughts and Old Men**

Oh my fckin god I'm actually at Hogwarts.

"SHT! What the hell am I supposed to do now!" I guess my mind had already figured that out cause I started walking up the sloping hill before my mouth even opened. But honestly, what does one do when at a place that isn't supposed to exist? Especially when you want to meet someone specifically!

Ok, I admit it, I was already planning a way to meet Malfoy. I mean, come on, he's HOT.

Anyway, as I'm walking up the sky is getting paler and paler. I guess I just jumped quite a bit of time cause the sun is rising. Yawn Man I'm tired.

Hold it, there's someone out here. At dawn? What could they possibly be doing? Wow, dumb question. Have I not read five Harry Potter books? I know plenty of things people can do at night in Hogwarts.

Heh. Dirty thought.

Wait, that kid is blonde! Maybe its—

"Hey! HEY! Can you help me!" What can I say, I'm a desperate muggle who just appeared at Hogwarts. What else was I going to do?

Anyway, he stopped and started walking towards me. Good. Wait. Wow I really am an idiot. Malfoy hates muggles.

"What?" he said in his usual drawling voice. Oh but he's so hot…and his voice is _really_ sexy. He was sneering at me, but I didn't care. I was just happy he was looking at me.

Then his face changed. It looked like he…like he didn't hate me anymore. Not the he really hated me in the first place, but his features were soft…and soooo sexy….

"I'm…I'm lost. Can you help?" I tried to sound innocent, but it came out more like I was terrified. But I guess that was a good thing because Malfoy smiled.

"Sure." He put his arm over my shoulders and began steering me towards Hogwarts. Oh. My. God. Draco Malfoy has his arm around me.

Tries not to smile>

"What's your name?" he asked in his sexy British accent.

"Shayna. You?" Kelli popped into my head at this moment. I could just see the look on her face when I tell her I've been to Hogwarts. But this was bad timing. I was with Draco. Piss off Kelli.

"The name's Malfoy, Draco Malfoy." My name is Bond, James Bond. Whatever. "How did you get lost?"

Almost to the doors. Oh my god. I'm going to see the inside of Hogwarts. I'm going to be in _Hogwarts._ Eeeeeeeeeeeee….!

"I was…uh…" Think of something Shayna! "I was walking. And I guess I wasn't paying attention to where I was going. Next thing I know I'm here." Wow I'm a liar. Oh well. I don't even think a wizard would believe this truth.

"Alright. Don't you worry, you're at Hogwarts." He opened the doors. Holy shnap these doors are huge. "You can stay in the Slytherin house until we figure where you belong."

I don't think I heard a word of what he just said. This place…its beyond description. The thought J.K. Rowling must have had to create a place like this… Hogwarts is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen in my life.

"Oh look, it's Weasel and the Mudblood." _That_ got my attention. Ron and Hermione?

Sure enough, Malfoy was talking to Ron and Hermione, meanwhile Hermione had her hand on Ron's arm so he didn't attack Malfoy. That's probably a good thing. Hm. I do love Draco's looks, but he really should be nicer to them. Harry too. But Harry's not here, so I'll have to somehow "find out" about him later.

"Draco, that's not very nice," I said. I walked over. "I'm Shayna."

Yes, I'm purposely not saying my last name. They probably wouldn't be able to pronounce it and there's no need to make them try.

"Ron Weasley," said Ron, though his expression was probably the opposite of friendly.

"Hermione Granger." Hermione's hair was bushier than I thought. Hm… I'll have to tell Kelli.

Yawn> Ok. I'm tired. How I got this tired this fast I have no idea, but I am. The novelty of being at Hogwarts has worn off and I'm ready for bed. Now.

"Draco, I'm a bit yawn> sleepy," I said. I can explore tomorrow, and I do _not_ wish to see Malfoy and Ron fight right now.

He looked at me, then back and Ron and Hermione. The fire in his eyes was inescapable, but I didn't have to escape it. Just pull it from Ron and Hermione.

"Ok." He took a few steps toward me—eeee, he's coming closer to me—before turning one last time to face the other pair. "Tell Potty I said hello, Mudblood." Ron tried to get at Malfoy again, but we were walking and Hermione had the back of his robes.

Ron and Hermione really are good together. They _should_ go out.

Yawn> Screw Ron and Hermione. I'm going to fall asleep walking if Draco doesn't get me in bed soon.

Heh. Another dirty thought.

"I don't know where you're going to sleep. You can't sleep in the boys' dormitories, and I don't think you can sleep in the girls' either—"

"Mr. Malfoy, who have you picked up on your patrol?" came an old voice from next to us. I jumped, Malfoy pulled his wand out, but it was just Dumbledore.

Dang! For god's sake Dumbledore! Ever heard of a haircut?

"My name's Shayna. I'm lost." Yawn. And tired!

"I found her wandering the grounds, Professor." There was a bitter tone in his voice. I personally have nothing against Dumbledore, but that's just how Malfoy is. It's because of his father. Oh I could wring Lucious Malfoy's neck…

"Well Ms. Shayna, you will be sleeping in a room in the Slytherin house tonight. I will make it myself. Is that alright with you?" His eyes twinkled behind his half moon "spectacles."

"Yes." As long as there's a bed I'm happy! Please! Sleep!

Well I guess Dumbledore read my mind or whatever cause he lead me and Draco straight down to the Slytherin common room. It's cold in here.

shivers.>

Oh shnap. Malfoy totally just put his arm around me again. Except this time, he is a lot closer to me! grins.

Wow. Dumbledore literally made me a room. There's now a door in the wall. Holy crap! This is a nice room!

"I trust you will sleep well," Dumbledore wheezed. How old is this guy? "When you wake there will be a house-elf to escort you to my office. Are these arrangements alright?"

I nodded, already half asleep. I barely realized that a house-elf was going to be watching me sleep.

"Good night." Dumbledore left. But as I walked into the room, Draco followed.

I stopped at the door. "Thank you for helping me," I said softly. I don't know why I was whispering. Probably because I was too tired to speak normally.

"I couldn't just leave you out there to freeze. Besides, that oaf Hagrid would've probably crushed you." He sneered. That sneer of his was getting annoying.

"Well, thank you anyway," yawn> Ok, now leave. I'm tired. As I've mentioned several times.

Draco hesitated at the door. God am I going to have to demonstrate how to leav— Holy sh...oot! Draco Malfoy just kissed me.Oh snap! I just got kissed by THE Draco Malfoy! I grabbed him as he turned to leave and kissed him again. This time it lasted a full half hour.


	3. Chapter 3

oh my goodness people like my story:is uber grateful:

but i would like to insert here how this story came to be. my bestestest friend ever, shayna, and i were taking turns blowing up an air mattress for me to sleep on one night at her house and i decided to tell her a story during her turns. well, the lovely story was basically a shorter, less detailed version of this. and then i decided that since she liked it so much (she couldn't stop thinking about malfoy that whole night) i'd write it down for her. and so i did. and i finished it the night before HBP came out, so nothing from that book would influence my writing. which it's a good thing i did that.

so this is not a story about me, no, it's a story about and for my bestest friend ever, shayna. i am the kelli girl in this. she be the one that 3's malfoy. (not to dissuade you malfoy lovers from reading my story. by all means, continue!)

okay, kelli's shutting up now!

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**Chapter 3: New clothes, new love**

Wow. I think I'm in shock. I just totally had my first make-out session with Draco Malfoy. I mean, he's not even supposed to be real! I'm sooo not going to be able to sleep…

yawn.

…………….

I guess I fell asleep cause it sure isn't dawn anymore. Well, I can't really tell considering I'm in the dungeons, but my hair's all messy and my clothes are twisted. Oh shoot. I have no other clothes. Am I going to have to wear the same thing every day till I get home? Gross! And where are the showers?

Sitting up, I noticed a pile of robes on the table by the door. I guess someone realized I had no clothes with me. Hm…

"Good morning miss," some squeaky voice said. There was that house-elf Dumbledore had told me about. It had hats piled on top of its bald head and socks everywhere. All his clothes were unprofessionally knitted, and his eyes reminded me of tennis balls. "I am Dobby the house-elf. Dumbledore told Dobby to bring Miss Shayna to his office when she wakes."

"Dobby!" Dang. Perfectly fits his description. I don't think I'm going to be out of shock for a month. "Uh…can you leave while I change?"

"Yes miss of course." He hesitated at the door. Why? As he opened it I figured out why. Draco was out there. Dobby used to belong to the Malfoys. Hm.

"Wait. Maybe you could…uh…just stand in my closet or something." No I'm not the brightest person in the world, but I'm not letting Draco mess with Dobby just because I needed to change. Wait…I don't need to change…robes go _over_ my clothes! Wow I'm stupid.

"Anything Miss Shayna wishes!" Dobby hopped over to my closet. Hey! I've got a closet!

"No never mind Dobby. You don't have to hide." His bright tennis-ball-eyes looked up at me in thanks as I pulled the robes over my head. These Hogwarts robes are actually really comfortable…and warm. Wait there's a patch on my robes. "Dobby whose robes are these?"

"They're yours now miss. Professor Dumbledore has made Slytherin robes for you." He didn't seem too happy about this, but sure enough, the badge on my boob was the Slytherin symbol, a serpent. Not my favorite house, but whatever.

Dobby led me to Dumbledore's office, behind the huge eagle statue, just like its supposed to be. Talking to Dumbledore was rather uneventful. I told him I'm supposed to be in the Minnesota in the United States, but I somehow came here in a flash of light, except that Hogwarts isn't supposed to exist, yada yada yada. He just sat there and listened, along with literally every portrait in his office, and then told me that when they figured out how to get me home, they would. For now I just had to wait. I also got to meet Fawkes, which was really super cool. Dumbledore said that I could have one of his feathers. I'll probably give it to Kelli-she loves Fawkes. Besides, I get real Slytherin robes. Much better than a stupid feather.

Anyway it was about noon when we were done so Dumbledore brought me down to the Great Hall. It's gorgeous. I mean, it's breathtaking. The ceiling looked as though it opened up to the sky, and that was totally awesome, even if it was raining. Dumbledore had me sit at the Slytherin table, and of course I sat by Draco.

"Hi Draco!" I may have been a little overenthusiastic last night. But what can I say, you're hot!

"Hello Shayna!" he answered with the same enthusiasm as me. Then he kissed my cheek. Draco kissed my cheek! Ok yeah it's not as exciting after you've made out. "Glad you finally woke up. I was worried I'd killed you." He was kidding, right?

"Ha." Haha, GOOD ONE! Inside joke. "I guess I'm stuck here for awhile. Dumbledore says he has to figure out how to bring me home."

"Well I'm happy. I don't want you to leave!" Draco said. That's it, I'm hooked. "So you'll be staying here for awhile?"

"Yep yep yep!" Another inside joke. Stop Shayna. He looked at me funny, but at the end of lunch he kissed me before heading off to classes again. So I guess he's not weirded out by me. (Kelli it's your fault I'm so weird!)

The next few weeks went by really fast. Draco and I were officially a couple now and we were having make-out sessions pretty much every night. And don't worry, I went into Hogsmeade with some money I borrowed from Draco and bought some clean clothes right away, and Pansy Parkinson showed me where the bathrooms are. They're really quite nice. It amazes me that J.K. Rowling hasn't mentioned them. Well, besides Moaning Myrtle's bathroom.

Oh. I met her too. Crybaby.

I must admit I was insanely happy here. I was in Hogwarts, for crying out loud, and I was dating the hottest student there. And he liked me as much as I liked him. Yes Draco Malfoy does have a heart, no I'm not lying. He can be really sweet at times. But other times he's kind of…aggressive. Specifically when he's had a run-in with Harry, Ron, and/or Hermione. He doesn't beat me or anything, but the make-out session after is always rather…uh…rough, we'll say. But he does these things that are so cute that you don't think he's the evil Slytherin boy from the Harry Potter books. He's a totally different person. His favorite color is silver, of course, but he doesn't especially like snakes. I've learned so much about him. And I think I'm falling in love with him. Maybe.

But I miss my friends. I miss Kelli and Tom, I miss my mom and my brother and Calvin, I miss Shawn and Stephanie, and I miss Tobey, Shadow and Halo most of all. (They're my cats. I _love_ my cats.) I miss everything Minnesota has that Hogwarts doesn't. I want to go home, but I want to take Draco with me.

Dumbledore says he doesn't know how to get me home yet, but what will happen when he does?


	4. Chapter 4

sorry it's taken me so long to post, been busy and all and my computer is like dying. so don't hold your breath waiting. i will post when i can, but, no guarantees on how often that'll be.

so yeah, on with the story!

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Chapter 4: Fights at Night

It was about a month and a half after I first got here when Draco and I were sitting in the Slytherin common room talking. Ok, we were making out, but at this moment I wanted to ask him something.

"Draco?" I said. I'm sooo grateful right now. Thank you Harry, Ron, and Hermione for staying out of Draco's way today! This would be much harder if he was angry.

"Yes?" Heh. He held his S that time. Like a snake himself.

"What are we going to do when I go home?" We had already discussed what my home was like, leaving out the fact that this place and everyone in it was in a fictional book where I come from. He knew I missed everyone from Minnesota. But he liked to avoid the topic of me actually leaving.

"You're going to go home when you go home. I can't stop you." His voice was hard and unhappy. Grr.

"You could stop me if you really wanted to," I replied. It's true. I mean, he's a wizard. I'm a muggle. I'm powerless.

"I don't want to hurt you," was all he said. Well, at least he's talking to me.

"I don't want to hurt you either Draco, but I'm going to leave sometime, and I don't want us to be on less-than-friendly terms when I do." Men. Can't talk about anything below their skin. Especially feelings.

"When you leave you'll probably be so happy you'll completely forget about me and go out with some fellow from your school or something." He stood up, pushing me over. (I had been laying on top of him.) "Why do you bring this up? Because you want to agitate me?"

"No! Draco I don't want to leave you! But you and I both know this isn't where I belong. I'm not even on the right continent!" I stood up too, but he had already walked to the other side of the common room.

"If you don't want to leave than why are you?" he yelled at me. He's going to have to be quieter if he doesn't want to wake the entire house. Everyone's asleep except us.

"Because I don't belong here Draco! I don't have a drop of magic in my blood! I've got friends and family at home that are going to worry about me! I've got a life in Minnesota, Draco. Here I'm just 'Malfoy's girlfriend'." Not that there's anything wrong with that, I just like to have a name.

"Suddenly that's not good enough for you?" He was still shouting. Shut _up _Draco! "I've cared more about you than I do my own father! I've devoted myself to you, and this is the thanks I get?"

Excuse me? "You think I don't care about you?" I asked softly, tears welling in my eyes.

He didn't reply. He looked me dead in the eye. "I'm going to bed," he said softly.

He left. He left me crying in the middle of the common room. Somehow I made it to my room, though I don't remember how. I can't believe this. Draco thinks I don't care about him? I probably care about him more than anyone else in this school! What on earth is happening to me…?


	5. Chapter 5

and i realized chapter four is rather short so i decided to be nice and give you two chapters instead of just one short one. so here ya go!

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Chapter 5: Going Home?

I must've cried myself to sleep because I now find myself lying in bed with the sheets messed up. Why am I crying again….? Oh yeah, only cause my boyfriend doesn't believe that I care about him and thinks I'm just using him till I get home.

Crap now I'm going to start crying again.

"Miss Shayna?"

I jumped. Arg! I jump too easily.

"Professor Dumbledore wishes to speak with Shayna. He sent Dobby to get her." Sure enough, it was Dobby. He looked down. "Dobby hopes he didn't find Shayna at a bad time…"

I wiped my tears away. I probably looked dreadful, but at the moment I don't really care. It's just Dumbledore anyway.

"No. I'll come. Don't worry Dobby you didn't catch me at a bad time." I stood up only to find that my arm is asleep. Gee, that'll help my mood.

Well I guess I said something to cheer Dobby up because he's bouncing around waiting for me.

"This way, Miss Shayna," he said, smiling.

"How many times do I have to tell you to just call me Shayna?" Ok, I'm a little irritable right now. What do you expect?

"To call Miss Shayna by just her first name is a sign of disrespect. Dobby respects Miss Shayna very much." Oh. My. God. This house-elf is going to drive me nuts.

I dropped it. I'm not exactly in the mood to politely tell Dobby that calling a person by their first name is a sign of friendship. He wouldn't listen to me anyway.

Out in the common room I looked around. No Draco. He probably wouldn't talk to me anyway. He seemed pretty mad last night. But what is he pissed off about? I'm the one that was pulled out of my home (well, technically Tom's, but I spend enough time there it very well is part of my home), thrown into a school that's not even supposed to exist, and I'm the one that fell for a fictional character! Of course, he's the one that fell for the girl who just appeared on the Hogwarts lawn one day when he was "patrolling." He's the one getting "ditched" when I go home. Grrrr. I've got it so much worse than him. This place is like his second home. For me, it's just a fictional place that Kelli and I talk about. None of this is real to me. So why is _he_ pissed off? Simply because I wanted to make sure he didn't hate me when I went home?

"Bubble gum!" I heard Dobby's little voice yell. Looking up I saw the giant eagle statue jump out of the way and a staircase appear behind it. I guess we're at Dumbledore's office already.

Uh oh. What if I have to go home? What if Dumbledore figured out a way to get me home but I have to leave now? What if I don't get to say good-bye to Draco?

Ugh. I am NOT having a good day.

Well we got to the top of the stairs and Dobby led me inside.

"Good morning Shayna!" Dumbledore greeted me happily. "I trust you're enjoying your stay at Hogwarts?"

"Yeah. It's cool." Monotone! Oh well, don't care, I'm depressed, piss off.

"Is there something you wish to tell me, Shayna?" he asked.

Hello! Not Harry Potter standing in front of you! Though he can do that one thing….what's it called…

"Shayna?"

"Oh sorry. No, there's nothing. I'm good." Oops. Well that was a giveaway that something's on my mind.

"Well, you will be happy to know that I have finally devised a way for you to go home." He pulled out a vile of clear liquid. "You must drink this potion and you will be taken back to your home." He held it out to me.

"Do I have to drink it now?" I asked hesitantly. I took the vile from his hands and held on to it. The liquid inside cooled the vile.

"No. You may drink it whenever you please." He smiled. He probably is thinking I want to spend more time with Draco. "But be warned that in a week _that_ potion won't be good anymore. I will have to make more."

I looked down at the clear stuff. I almost wanted to drink it down now, to leave this place, just to go home. But I knew I had to say good-bye. I would hate myself for leaving when Draco was mad at me.

So I made a decision. "I'll drink it by the end of this week, and I'll have Draco tell you when I've gone."

"Are you sure you're alright with this, Shayna?"

I didn't say anything at first. I didn't really know the answer myself. I mean, yeah I want to go home, but I want to stay in this magical place too.

"Yes. I'll be fine."


	6. Chapter 6

i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry! i realize it's been forever but life's been crazy and i'm shutting up cause they're only excuses and you just want the story!

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Chapter 6: Love and Dreams 

I didn't let go of that stupid vile of liquid all the way back to the common room. But in there, I stared at it. I stared at it so long and so hard that you'd think the solution to all my problems was hiding in that clear liquid, just waiting for me to discover it. I was still staring at it as Slytherins came through between classes, and I continued watching the fluid through lunch. Not that it mattered. I wasn't hungry. All through the afternoon I sat there, thinking. What if I just swallowed it all? What if I didn't say goodbye to Draco? Would he forget about me? Mourn me? Hate me? Would his memory of me be so strong that he finds a way to come to me? Would my stay here affect him so much that the Malfoy in the books would be noticeably different? Would everyone in the school forget I ever existed? Would Draco forget me? What if I didn't leave? What if I never drank the potion? Could I stay here with witches and wizards, though I've got no magic myself? If I didn't leave, would Dumbledore kick me out? If I stayed, would Draco realize I did care for him? If I left, would he continue thinking I didn't care about him?

It was then that I realized two things. First, Draco would not believe me until I convinced him. Unfortunately, I needed to leave. I couldn't stay here, and I knew it. So that gave me a week. But my second realization was much bigger.

I realized I loved him.

Now, I know there are people out there who say they love their boyfriends right away coughKellicough but I am not one of them. I take the use of the word "love" very seriously. I don't think you should say you love someone unless you really do. And, though I hated to admit it, I loved Draco Malfoy.

And now I'm crying. The man-slash-boy I love thinks I don't even care about him. I've got less than a week to convince him he's wrong, but unfortunately he's a Slytherin, and Slytherins are very stubborn people. They do not easily admit they're wrong.

"I was wrong, wasn't I?" came a cold, drawling voice from in front of me.

Yep, you recognized it.

"D-Draco?" I could barely comprehend the feelings going through me right now. Happiness because he's talking to me, amazement because he admitted he was wrong, fear that he'll still reject me, pain because of last night, awe because I realized I loved him, nervousness because I knew I needed to tell him, and...just so much, I could barely comprehend it all.

He came over and sat next to me. He looked at me for a moment, taking the time to wipe the tears off my cheeks with his thumb. Then he pulled me to him and hugged me. He just sat there and held on to me as though he would never let me go. He must've sensed I would be leaving soon, because he had never held me like that before. In his arms I continued crying, but these tears were of joy.

Unfortunately, he didn't sense that, and thought I was still weeping about last night.

"I'm sorry," he said. The usual coldness that filled his voice was gone. He was being honest. "I didn't mean to hurt you. I just…I know that you leaving means I'll probably never see you again, and I don't want to deal with that yet." He started rubbing my shoulder. "I don't want us to end," he whispered.

I couldn't stand it. I sat up, smiling.

"Shayna?" Draco asked, confused.

"Draco, it's okay!" I was about to start laughing I was so happy. "God, all I wanted was for you to talk to me, and look at you!" Then I did start laughing. "Thank you…" I said after the laughter subsided. "So you know that I do care about you?"

This time he chuckled. Yep, that's right, Draco chuckled. "How could I doubt you?" He looked at me, deep into my eyes. I _love_ it when he does that. "I snuck in your room last night," he told me. I said nothing. So he continued. "I wanted to know if you were okay, so I snuck in." I still said nothing. "You were mumbling in your sleep…I thought it was just some dream you were having, but then you started talking about me. You were calling out to me, tossing and turning, but I guess I wasn't answering. So I walked over andreplied toyou. You talked to me like you were awake. Hell, I thought you were awake for a while. You told me you wanted to stay, but couldn't. You explained it all so brilliantly that even Crabbe and Goyle could've understood." He paused and looked down. "Then you started going on about pink penguins and black and white flamingos. I figured you were having a normal dream, so I left."

This amazed me. I was dreaming about pink penguins! Just kidding!

I remembered vaguely having a dream about Draco last night, but no details came to me. But then…there was one small detail that slowly came to me…the one that made me realize I loved him… Snap. I told him I loved him in my dream. What if he was still there when I said it?

"Did I say anything…else to you?" I asked carefully.

He glanced up at me nervously before looking back at the knees of his robes. "You told me you loved me," he whispered.

Okay, so that checks telling him I love him off my list of things to do today.

We kind of just sat there for a minute. I was slowly working up the courage to tell him that it was true, while he was probably still thinking about me and my dream-honesty. For some reason, I thought of Peachie, my old cat, and courage leapt into me.

"Draco?" He looked up. "I do love you."

He stared at me, open jaw and everything. For some reason that open jaw bugged me, so I reached over and shut it. He still stared.

"Hello?" I asked. His eyes came back into focus and he shook his head.

"Sorry…you're not joking, are you?" he asked cautiously.

"No."

A wave of relief flooded through his face, closely followed by a red blushing of embarrassment. "Good." He paused. "Because I love you too."

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(a/n: i realize some of the chapters are rather short, but this was supposed to be a short story, so, well, that pretty much explains the shortness. the chapters do get a little longer as the story continues though, so never fear!) 


	7. Chapter 7

thanks to two super quick comments, i was inspired to update right away.

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**Chapter 7:The Truth…after a make-out session, of course!**

This time it was my turn to stare at him in amazement. Did he really just say what I thought he said? Did he really just tell me he loved me? Did he just…say it offhand after staring at me for god knows how long when I said it? Did he actually tell me he loved me too?

As if he read my mind, he answered all my questions. "Yes. I said it. And I'll say it again. I love you. I don't care if you've got to go home, I still love you with all my heart." And then he kissed me. Oh, that was a really nice kiss…like, floating in the clouds nice, or, never having to leave him nice. When he pulled away I leaned forward, ready for more.

"More?" he asked, reminding me of an old story I had written. I quickly trashed the thought.

"Yes please," I said before realizing how desperate I sounded. But Draco didn't care. He just grinned and kissed me again with another one of those amazing floating in the clouds kisses.

What followed was the best make-out session I have had in my entire life. Granted, I wouldn't call myself an expert at make-out sessions, but I've had my fair share. This one though…Draco had never kissed me that passionately before and I was planning on making it last as long as I could before going home.

It wasn't until after dinner, when Slytherins were pouring into the common room once more, that Draco and I ended our kissing fest. Of course, most of the Slytherins wouldn't have minded even if we had kept making out, but there are those few who would watch us (creepy!) and I don't particularly like making out in front of others anyway. As I was laying next to Draco on the couch (yes, next to. well, more underneath, but sh!) I felt something poking me from underneath. My first thought was "pudding," because for some reason my sick mind hadn't left me yet, but I quickly dismissed that on account of Draco being on top of me, not under me. And then I remembered that blasted vile of liquid I was supposed to be taking care of.

"SH-T! I mean, SNAP!" I said, pushing Draco off of me.

"What? What is it!" Draco said, spazzing because he thought that he had done something wrong.

I pulled the little bugger out from under me and examined it. It was fine. No cracks, no potion leaking everywhere. Phew.

"What's that?" Draco asked suspiciously. Crap. I didn't know exactly why, but for some reason I felt that this potion should've been kept a secret. At least for a while. But I think he knew what it was. So I told him.

"Draco, Dumbledore gave me this potion this morning. He says that if I take it, I'll go home. But, the problem is, I have to drink it before the end of the week." I looked at Draco uncertainly. You have no idea how hard I was praying that he didn't get all pissy again. He seemed to study the vile for a while, then he took it from me gently. He sat up and turned the liquid around, watching it, making me realize how silly I must've looked when he caught me doing the same thing. Finally, he looked at me. Another one of those deep, penetrating looks, but not the kind that makes you melt. It was one of those looks that make you wonder what they're thinking; one of those looks that made you wonder about a lot of stuff.

"Draco?" I asked tentatively. I could see tears welling up in his eyes. This amazed me. Draco never cries, not for anything. He's one of those guys that you think don't even have tear glands or something, because seeing them cry would be like seeing God and still not believing in him. I scooted closer to him, scared. "Draco?" I asked a bit more urgently.

He looked down and grabbed my hand. Before saying anything, he pulled me away, all the way out to the grounds, past Hagrid's and even past Hogsmeade. Finally he pulled me down under a tree next to the lake. There was a blanket laid out already, along with some juice and fruits from the kitchens.

"Were you planning this all along?" I asked, my worry momentarily vanished in my awe. From where I stood, the entire view of the lake was absolutely gorgeous. The giant squid wasn't waving its tentacles aimlessly, so the surface was as smooth as glass. The crescent moon was reflected perfectly, along with the surrounding mountains and stars. I was in shock it was so beautiful.

"Draco…my god…this is…it's…" Yes, I was having problems talking. What can I say? Words don't describe how striking this place was; they don't even come close. "It's absolutely marvelous," I finally said.

He didn't say anything. I turned my eyes to him and I was struck by an even more inspiring image than the lake could ever be. Draco, standing in the moonlight, his hair and face so pale it looked like he glowed, his shoulders gently shaking, and tears silently falling down his face. I swear that in that moment, he looked like a fallen angel. And he was my fallen angel. My job was to get him flying again, hopefully soaring.

I stepped forward until I could touch him. As I reached out to him, he turned away, hiding his face from me. He didn't want me to know. But it was too late, I knew, and I wasn't going to do nothing, that's for sure. I tried again, stepping around him so I could face him, but this time he didn't turn away. This time he collapsed against the tree trunk, sobbing. I dropped next to him and hugged him fiercely, as hard as I could. We sat that way for a long time…

"I'm sorry," Draco whispered suddenly into my robes.

"Sorry? For what? You didn't do anything wrong. You-"

"Shayna, I…I…I really don't want you to go home, but I know you need to, and I thought I was okay with that, but…" We were both sitting on the ground, with him leaning on me. He pulled away. "I don't know if I can let you go," he said simply.

"Draco." He was watching the ground, so I lifted his chin and made him look at me. "Draco, stop."

His face was sopped with his tears, so I used my sleeve to wipe them all away. Now he was watching me. When his lip started trembling again, I knew he wasn't done.

"I don't want to lose you."

With that he got up and walked to the very edge of the shoreline.

I got an idea. Maybe it wasn't a very bright one, and there was a chance that it would make things worse, but I thought it had a better probability of helping than hurting. So I took off my robes (Don't worry; I had normal clothes on underneath.) and walked up beside him.

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a/n: aha...CLIFFHANGER!


	8. Chapter 8

ha. thank danica01 for getting this post up. "ah, darn you cliffhanger!"

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Chapter 8: Swimming and Crying

"Wanna go for a swim?" I asked in my most upbeat manner.

He looked at me quizzically before choking out, "What?"

"I said, do you want to go for a swim? It's a gorgeous night." I felt terrible pretending he was fine, but I had to in order for this to work.

"Er…" Yes! It was working! He was so confused by my suddenly nonchalant mood that he couldn't focus on that wretched vile.

I tugged at his arm. "Come on…please? Shayna wants you to go swimming." I whipped out my pouty face and laid on the flirtations thicker than hair on a bear.

"Erm…okay…" Draco said, his confusion seeping through his words. "I'm not really in the mood for a swim right now though."

"That's okay. I can change that." I grinned, partially because I was being such a flirt, partially because my 'devious' plan was working. I ran into the water as Draco pulled his robes off. By the time I had gotten deep enough to fully submerge myself he was already wading in after me. I realized he wasn't wearing a shirt and suddenly became nervous. What if he thought I was going to have sex with him!

My fears were chased off fast enough. Draco stopped five feet away from me. "Okay, we came, we swam. Are you satisfied?" So my plan wasn't quite going on schedule, oh well.

"No." I swam farther out. Now he was nearly fifteen feet away.

"Shayna, come on, I really don't want to swim right now. Can we just go back to the blanket?" He sounded kind of…irritated, or annoyed, or something. But I wasn't going to give up.

"Sure," I said before grinning evilly. "But you have to come get me."

"Shayna stop. This isn't the time for games. Let's leave." Despite his insistence on leaving, I noticed he was slowly moving towards me. Obviously he didn't want me to notice, so I didn't say anything. Still, it told me I was having success.

"I'm not playing a game. I want you to come get me," I replied stubbornly. This time I made myself sound serious. Not that it was hard, considering he had been close to bawling five minutes ago.

He sighed. "Fine," he said and swam towards me. I saw—with great pleasure I might add—that he had wonderful muscles and that he was a brilliant swimmer. The tension that had been holding me in fear and hope mutated and made me nervous-slash-excited just from his body. Oh snap…

When he reached me I just stayed still, treading water, waiting. "Well?" he asked.

"Well what? I told you that you had to come get me. That implies that not only do you have to swim to me, you have to bring me back as well." Mischief probably radiated from me at that point. I was being soooo mean.

But then, like a miracle, I saw my mischief reflecting in his eyes. He was catching on! It was working!

"So you won't come unless I drag you?" he said impishly. I could tell he was trying to not be so swept away by this, but he was failing miserably.

"Right," was the only thing I could think of to say. He was very close again. I don't know why I was so shaky, I mean it's not like we haven't made out already, but the look in his eyes kind of scared me. It was like they hungered for something, I just hoped it was something I was willing to feed.

"Brilliant," Draco said, his wicked grin spreading across his face. He cupped my face with one of his hands and started kissing me. To my astonishment, this kiss wasn't anything like the passion-filled one from the common room. This kiss was…

He started kissing me more, becoming more… aggressive. His other arm slid around my waist, pulling me closer to him, while his hand slowly slid down my neck, and my shoulder, before finally wrapping around me and pushing my upper back towards him. Not that I didn't enjoy it, you know. For some reason I realized that while I had to tread water to keep myself above water, Draco was tall enough to stand. I took advantage of that and wrapped my arms around his shoulders. I kissed back. Even then, his kisses became more aggressive. I realized that this was the hunger I had seen in his eyes. He wanted to know and be absolutely positive that I belonged to him. He wanted to be able to kiss me like we wouldn't have to part. He wanted to know just how much I loved him, and he wanted to prove that he loved me too.

It took a few moments to realize that we were moving. Draco was walking back inland. I wondered briefly if he was expecting sex, but I was so swept away that I didn't think twice about it. I trusted him, and I wanted him, and that was all that mattered.

By the time we were back on the blanket Draco was laying on top of me. His kisses were so intense that I could feel my lips going numb. His hand started sliding under my shirt, but he never went for my boobs, so I really didn't care. I was enjoying this so much that I probably would not have cared even if he had gone for my boobs, but either way I can easily say that we made out for a _very_ long time.

By the time we finally stopped, it was probably around eleven. Our little snogging session had been so passionate that we were both semi-exhausted, so we just curled up together and looked at the stars.

"Shayna?" Draco whispered to me. His breath tickled my ear, but I ignored it. He seemed to want to say something important.

"Yeah?" I replied. I didn't turn to him; instead I just let him talk.

"I love you," he said simply.

I grinned. "I love you too."

There was a long pause during which I wondered if that was all he had wanted to say. But alas, there was more, and it was not something I expected.

"So when are you going to take the potion?" he asked suddenly.

I was so surprised I turned to him to make sure he wasn't messing with me. Guys have been known to do that.

"What?"

"C'mon, we both know you're going home by the end of the week whether we like it or not," he said matter-of-factly.

"Er… I dunno…probably towards the end of the week I guess. Are you suddenly okay with that?" You have no idea how confused I was right then.

He stared at nothing for a while, thinking, before he stubbornly nodded his head. "Yes. I know you have to go home. I might as well enjoy the time I have left with you." He looked at me again…god I love those eyes.

"Good," I said, happy that my plan had worked, though not really the way I had planned it. "I wouldn't want to leave and have you be all grumpy about it."

"Just promise me something," he said fervently.

"Anything."

"Promise you'll never forget me."

I twisted my body so I was facing him and kissed him. Then I looked into those eyes. "Draco, how could I ever forget you?"

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-and i put this on the bottom because i know a lot of people really don't read these but OMG i'm super excited to see the goblet of fire tomorrow. like oh my gosh. so excited.

...i'm never gonna sleep tonight...


	9. Chapter 9

HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYBODY!

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**Chapter 9: What You Didn't Know**

After our little mushy moment we curled up together and feel asleep. I'm sure it would've been the cutest thing if we didn't wake up freezing during that pre-dawn time. But I guess it was a good thing, cause Draco had classes to get to, and I needed to shower and crap.

By the time we arrived back in the common room the Slytherins who woke up earliest were starting to appear. Some just hung around relaxing or doing homework, but most left for breakfast. Considering the fact that it was just now dawn though, the common room was pretty empty.

He pulled me towards a corner near my door. "Was it as good for you as it was for me?" he asked jokingly.

"Oh yeah," I replied, playing along. "Probably even better."

He grinned. "I doubt that." He bent down and kissed me. (What can I say? I AM shorter than him.) "You should go get changed, get some proper rest. I'm going to change real quick before heading up to breakfast, then to classes." He kissed me on the cheek, than walked away. I leaned against the wall, remembering last night, how perfect it had been…

"So, you two finally did it?" someone asked. If I remembered right, that girl standing next to me was Pansy Parkinson. She was scowling. I also remembered that in book five Pansy and Draco were "involved." tries not to return the scowl>

"Finally did what?" I asked as politely as I could. Already this girl was bothering me. Sadly, it didn't even occur to me what "it" could be.

"You know, _it,_" she said, looking at me like I was stupid. I still didn't get it. I was having a very blonde moment.

"Pansy,"—I really hoped I had the right name—"if you're not going to tell what you're talking about, I'm leaving." I gave her my best death glare.

"Oh my god. Seriously? You don't know what I'm talking about?" Once again, there's the god-you're-an-idiot look. I didn't say anything. "_Sex!_ Did you two finally have sex?"

"WHAT!" _Now_ I catch on…god I'm slow… "NO!" I yelled. Then I dropped the volume of my voice. "What…what could possibly make you think that! Why would I have sex with him?" I couldn't believe she had just asked me that. Draco and I had been going out for a few months, why would we have sex already? I mean, I am NOT like that, and neither is he. Or at least that's what I thought.

"Bloody hell, maybe cause you're dating him? And you have been for what three months now? It's about time." She sounded both offended and annoyed at the same time.

"About time! It's been three months! I'm not having sex with anyone after three months!" I said, my voice finally back to its regular level. "I can't believe you would think that!"

"Why not? It's totally common around here." Well, my personal views of this school just dropped a bit. Maybe she meant 'here' as in with the Slytherins. Probably, considering what the Gryffindors are like. "Three months is almost like you're holding out or something. Wait! Are you one of those girls that, like, doesn't have sex until they're married?" She stared at me with awe, as if this was something hard to do.

"Uh, yeah, that would be me." Well, I guess that tells me that _she's_ no longer a virgin. shudders>

"You're kidding! How could you do that! Draco's going to be disappointed, you know." Suddenly she gave me a very sly look and sounded all I-know-something-you-don't-know.

"Why would he be disappointed? We've talked about this already. He knows I don't want to…" For some reason I couldn't just say, "have sex." "He knows I don't want to do anything like that. And he's okay with that." Still, I looked at her suspiciously.

"So he told you _everything_?" Obviously not. "Everything he's done?"

"I think so…" but now I'm not so sure…

She grinned evilly. "Then you already know he's not a virgin, and it's all because of me."

* * *

well i don't know if i've told you this or not, but hp&gof was WICKED AWESOME. nothing describes it better. it was just super duper uber good. they did an excellent job. much better than poa, which i'm still pissed about. and the prefects' bathroom scene...let me tell ya, i almost drooled. can we say HOTTIE. but yeah. i'm shutting up now.

HAPPY TURKEY-CRANBERRYSAUCE-POTATOES-SALAD-CORN-ANDOTHERGOODSTUFF EATING UNTIL YOU FEEL LIKE YOU'RE GONNA HURL!

...then again, maybe that's just my family...


	10. Chapter 10

so i hope ever had a good thanksgiving. i would like to give thanks to my faithful reveiwers who tell me to keep going even though they're sick of saying it by now. so thanks much. aaaaaaaaand i'm shutting up now.

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**Chapter 10: Let the Truth Be Known**

My surprise at that statement was…beyond surprise. It was "wtf" and "omg" and "holy shnap" and all this other crap. I was so shocked I fell back against the wall, my mouth hanging open. Pansy stared at me, grinning evilly.

I stammered… "I…but…how…when…why didn't…what?"

She laughed, still with that "maHA!" look on her face. "What, you didn't know?"

I was suddenly really uber pissed. Instinctively, I just flat out punched Pansy. And I must say it was the highlight of my day. She flew—and I'm not kidding, she got some good air there—and landed on the couch, nose bleeding, crying, and confused. Sucker.

When she finally lifted herself up, she yelled "What the bloody hell was that for!" But I didn't answer her. I thought I heard footsteps coming down the stairs from the boys' dormitories. A wave of anger swept over me, and I most definitely did NOT want to see Draco. So I turned and calmly walked out the door.

As I exited, I heard Goyle's voice. He said "Pansy! What happened?" For some reason this infuriated me even more, and when I was a good distance away from the house door and any classrooms, I let out a nice, long, loud, infuriated, annoyed, confused, frustrated yell. It didn't really help.

I made my way out of the school, thinking about what I had just learned. Draco wasn't a virgin? Why didn't he tell me? I mean, he never said he wasn't…but one assumes that… And it's not like I wouldn't love him because of it, I've had non-virgin friends before. Hell, I've had non-virgin boyfriends before. It's just… Why didn't he tell me? Did he think I would be mad at him? And with _Pansy?_ That bitch is just…. UGH! She's such a BITCH. That's what she is. A bloody bitch with bitchy hair and bitchy clothes and bitchy everything. God I HATE her. What kind of psycho bitch tells people about that? I'll bet the entire house of Slytherin knows because of her. I'll bet she told anyone who would listen to her blabber. Grrr…

I sat myself under a tree totally opposite where I had spent last night. I found myself thinking about the events and thoughts that went through my head when we were over there. I had fleetingly thought he wanted to have sex with me. Now I think it's possible that he did. No, not possible, probable. He probably knew I'd never talk to him again if he tried, though. But why didn't he just tell me?

I discovered, while sitting under what I realized was a tree I'd never even seen before, that it really didn't matter to me all that much that he wasn't a virgin. I mean, okay yeah it did but the thing that bothered me most was that he didn't tell me, that I had to hear it from the bitch, a.k.a. Pansy.

I heard footsteps. I ignored them. I figured it was just another student going for a stroll. Hermione and Ron had passed me a while ago, and there were others who passed, so I wasn't in any hurry to find out who it may be. So I just sat there, looking out at the lake, thinking. But then the footsteps stopped, right behind me and to my left. I figured it was someone I knew, most likely Draco, but I was NOT going to turn around and find out.

"Shayna?" Yep, I was right. It's Draco. I ignored him. "Shayna? What's wrong?" He came and sat down next to me. He tried to wrap his arm around me, but I pulled away.

"Don't…" I said. I couldn't stop thinking about him and Pansy.

He looked at me, confused. "Don't? Don't what?"

"Don't…just don't…" I didn't want to tell him not to touch me, but that was my message. No touchy.

"Shayna, I can't not do it if you don't tell me what it is I'm not supposed to do." Okay, so he had a point. So what.

"Just…leave me alone…"

"What? I don't understand… Not an hour ago we were happy. Now suddenly you want me to leave you alone? Did something happen while I was changing? Pansy told Goyle you just stormed off for no reason—"

Those were the magic words.

"Oh, Pansy, of course. She must be right. I mean, you two have such a history. Of course she's not lying her stinking face off. Why would she do that? And that's of course excluding the fact that she's a _bitch._"

"What?"

"Oh me and her had a nice little chat. It was all peachy. And then I quote stormed off for—" does hand motions "—no reason? Psh. Sure. Of course. Who wouldn't want her around?"

"Shayna, you're not making any sense," he said, reaching to touch me again. I squirmed out of his reach.

"Don't."

He sighed, confused. "Don't _what?_"

"Don't touch me."

"What? Why not?"

"Because…god Draco why didn't you tell me?"

"Tell you what?" He was getting annoyed. I was avoiding saying it.

"Nothing…never mind…it's nothing…" I looked out at the lake again.

"Well obviously it's something."

I looked back at him. "Draco, have you been totally and completely honest with me?"

"What? Of course I have."

"So you've told me everything about your past?"

"Well not everything some details are rather boring and unimportant…"

"This most definitely is important. And you didn't tell me."

"Oh bloody hell didn't tell you what?"

"God Draco. How could you not tell me?"

"TELL YOU WHAT!"

"That you and Pansy were a lot more involved than I thought you were."

Draco's annoyance backed off. He was suddenly wary. "What do you mean?"

"Draco, you're not a virgin, are you?"

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a/n-mwahahaha...i love makin you readers squirm. fast reveiws means fast posts! 


	11. Chapter 11

SORRY! the computer was broken and i couldn't updateand i'm sorry really!

* * *

**Chapter 11: The Whole Story**

Draco just stared at me, obviously stunned at what I said. Then his gaze dropped and his face turned from one of confusion and frustration to one of surrender. "No, I'm not."

I looked away. I couldn't stand it. I didn't say anything. Sure he was admitting it, which gave him points, but why? I'm obviously mad at him, so why doesn't he just deny it like any other guy and try to get on my good side by lying to me? Granted, that would make it worse for him, but he's a guy, he doesn't think about the future. He's just another lying, two-faced, stupid, not-worth-the-trouble guy.

Right?

I stood up and walked to the shoreline. I could feel tears stinging my eyes. I'm not really sure why, but they were there. "Why didn't you tell me?" I asked quietly.

At first I thought he hadn't heard me, but after awhile he replied, "I don't know. I guess I didn't think you needed to know. I didn't think it would affect us much." I heard him shift, but not stand. "Maybe I just didn't think."

"Or maybe you thought you'd keep that bit of secrecy to yourself so that I'd be stuck in the shadows forever." I stood defiantly at the shore still. My arms were crossed, my cloak was flapping in a recent wind, my hair was everywhere, my eyes were staring at the center of the lake, and there were silent tears on my cheeks. "Maybe you wanted me to find out from little miss Pansy in there. Or maybe you plain out just didn't want me to know. I'll bet it's the last one. I'll bet you were just too damn afraid to say it yourself, so you decided not to tell me." My arms dropped to my sides and my hands clenched into fists. My voice was shaking. "Who cares what Shayna knows, honestly? 'What she doesn't know won't hurt her,' eh?" I turned my head so I could see him out of the corner of my eye. "Was that it?"

Draco stood. "Shayna, honestly, I meant to tell you. I wanted you to know. I just didn't know how to say it. I mean, how do you say that to someone, especially your girlfriend? And then…" His voice trailed off. "Last night was magnificent. And I enjoyed every moment of it. I really did. I was planning on telling you awhile ago, but I just never got the balls to do it." I heard him take a few steps towards me. "I _never_ wanted you to find out like this. _Ever._"

"Good." I still couldn't face him. I had more questions. "So it's all true. You and Pansy, I mean."

"Sadly, yes."

"Sadly? Most guys would be thrilled to…erm…be in your shoes."

"I never wanted to have sex with Pansy." His blunt-ness made me cringe a little. "I wanted to wait for the right girl, you know? But she just wouldn't leave me alone. She just had to do it. She said I was being the pansy by not doing it with her. She said all the other Slytherin boys would do it, why wouldn't I? But I still refused her. She got so mad she told the entire house that I was a virgin. Didn't really matter though, most people knew that already. She threatened to tell the whole school too, but we both knew it was an empty threat. No one outside Slytherin would care, and even most of Slytherin didn't care."

"So wait, Pansy wasn't a virgin when you two…?"

"Apparently not. She told me once there had been a guy before me, but he dumped her for some Muggle. She hasn't spoken to him since."

"That's disturbing." I almost forgot we were still on uncertain terms. Almost.

"Too true."

I turned toward him to understand better. "But, if you kept denying her, then what happened?"

"I'm not exactly sure. We were…snogging one night and she decided we needed drinks. She brings me this huge goblet filled with juice and makes me drink nearly half of it before she'll even kiss me again. That's the last thing I remember."

"Wait, what? You don't remember it?" What the hell?

"Well, kinda. I came to my senses, realized where I was and what I was doing, and immediately launched myself away from her. I couldn't believe it. I thought she had given up on the whole sex thing already. She hadn't mentioned it for weeks. And then I come back from unconsciousness or whatever it was and I'm doing…that? I was so angry with her I broke up with her that instant. She tried several times to get us back together, but it never worked. I barely even talk to her now."

"So wait, she drugged you or something just to have sex with you?" I couldn't believe my ears. What kind of person would do that? Especially for _that_?

"Basically."

"That BITCH!"

Draco's eyes widened in surprise. "Pardon me?"

I whirled around so I could properly face him. "First, she fucking drugs you, and then, well, Jesus Draco she fucking raped you!"

He looked at me, flabbergasted. "Well, yeah, I guess…I dunno I guess I never thought of it that way."

"How do you not think of it that way! You told her no! And she forced you to have sex with her anyway! That's rape! There's no other way to put it!" Okay, by now I was thoroughly pissed and wanting to punch Pansy's little bitch of a face so far in that she could see behind her.

"Shayna, calm down." He reached for me.

"No!" I stepped closer to him, so there was barely a foot between us. I whispered, "Don't you get it? You were raped and you're pretending like it was nothing!"

"It _was_ nothing!" I looked at him, giving him one of those "oh really?" looks. "Okay, maybe it wasn't nothing. But it didn't really matter to me until you came along. I just thought, oh well, would've happened sooner or later. But then you showed up and I fell more in love with you every day and every day I wished more and more it had never happened. That's why I didn't tell you. I figured I could forget about it, pretend it never happened. I thought that if I had a clean slate with you, I'd have a clean slate for good." He looked so pathetic at that moment I could've forgiven him. So I did.

"It's okay. Really. I just wish you would've told me. Ignoring it isn't going to make it go away." I stepped closer to him. I took his hands in mine and squeezed them.

"I know. I just wanted it so badly I must've made myself believe it." He didn't look at me.

"Draco." He continued staring at the ground between us. "Draco," I repeated, more commanding. He looked up at me. In his eyes I saw a mixture of regret and sadness and fear and hopelessness. "It's okay. Though, next time you feel the need to erase your past, you might want to remember how impossible that is." A small smile showed on his face and he looked back at the ground, fidgeting.

"I'll remember that," he said, slightly grinning. Then he tried to kiss me.

I pulled back. I guess I still needed to soak all this information up. "Sorry," I said before he could ask questions. "I just…I need more time, that's all." He continued to look at me, worried. "Really, I promise, I'll be fine. I just need more time to…get used to this." I flashed him a smile. "You can kiss me all you want later."

He still looked worried, but he nodded in acceptance. "Okay."

"Go to class. I'll see you at lunch."

He grabbed me and hugged me before I could move away.

"I love you, Shayna. Only you," he whispered in my ear.

I hugged him back. "I love you too."

He kissed me. "See you at lunch?"

"Lunch."

"Bye."

I stood there, watching him trot off to class. I wondered how much more damage little miss bitch would do to Draco and I.

I had no idea.


	12. Chapter 12

well nobody's been commenting but i figure, hey, i don't always comment on a new chapter, i'll bet there are still people who want to finish reading this story. so happy holidays, from me to you.**

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Chapter 12:Worrying and Missing

I stood where I was for a while; thinking about what had befallen me. Maybe all this stuff was happening now because I was having my own little climax. Or maybe it was just bad luck. But I was sure, whichever it was, it couldn't get terribly worse.

Could it?

That got me worrying. I thought about the two of them together, and I wondered if he would cheat on me. No, he wouldn't do that, I decided. He wouldn't hurt me like that.

I spent the entire morning anxious for lunch, just waiting to talk to him so I could know he still was the same as he was when he left me that morning. I barely remember showering, or changing, or even going off to the library, but I soon found myself there. I was just wandering the shelves aimlessly, looking at the titles without really seeing them, when I heard a drawling voice behind me.

"Did you really get so bored you had to come to the library?"

I whipped around, my heart beating. "Draco!" I nearly flew into his arms. He staggered back, trying to keep his balance so we didn't fall over.

"Well…hi." He looked down at me, confused. "You okay?"

"Oh, yeah, fine," I lied. "Sorry, just was happy to see you." I put on a fake smile.

"Right…" he replied, unbelieving. "So what are you doing here?" he asked.

"I'm not sure. Just looking for some entertainment, I guess." I started to relax. He was acting perfectly normal. Nothing was wrong, and I knew it. I had just been having one of my freaking-out/paranoid attacks.

"Oh," was all he said. No dirty comment. No witty reply. I started to get nervous again. His eyes seemed distant all of a sudden. "Well, I should head to class. I just saw you in here and I thought I should say hi." And without a moment to spare, he kissed my cheek and left. I didn't even have time to say bye to him.

Now I was worried. Why didn't he comment? He always does. Not that I particularly enjoy his sick mind, but it's usually quite amusing. I've gotten used to it. His comments make me laugh, instead of grossing me out. So why wasn't he commenting like he always does? And why did he leave so quickly? Why did his eyes get all distant? What was making him act so strange?

And then it struck me. Lately, Draco was making this little habit to always kiss me smack on the lips whenever we parted. He didn't care who was around. If there was no one around, he might even spend time on kissing me before he left. But just then…. He kissed my cheek.

Something was wrong. The air just _felt_ wrong. _I_ felt wrong. I ran out of the library and smack into a boy with black hair. His glasses went flying when I hit him.

"Oh I'm sorry! I'm just way out of it. Sorry!" I picked up his glasses and handed them to him.

I was faced with a tall seventeen-year-old with messy black hair and round glasses. His eyes were a vibrant green and there was a little scar on his forehead. I had gotten so used to seeing him I never thought twice about running face first into the Boy Who Lived. "I'm really sorry Harry. I didn't see you, I—"

"It's okay, really, it is," he interrupted politely, putting his glasses back on. "Hey, I know you," he said, recognizing me. His voice suddenly had an edge to it. "You're Malfoy's girlfriend."

"Indeed I am, though I prefer the name Shayna." I held out my hand. From the look on his face, he was definitely not expecting Malfoy's girlfriend to shake his hand.

"Shayna. I guess you already know me." He took my hand. His robes moved with him, revealing many of the same muscles Draco had. I assumed they were from Quidditch, because Harry's were slightly more defined, and he definitely moved with a certain self-conscious walk that made you think he was more comfortable off the ground than on it.

"I do. Look, I'm really sorry about running into you like that," I said sincerely. "I guess I wasn't looking where I was going. I didn't see you."

He looked at me quizzically. "You're not what I expected a girl of Malfoy's to be like," he said bluntly. "When Hermione said you couldn't be all that bad, I thought she was just being overly soft."

"Yes, well, I'm not exactly like other girls Draco has dated." I couldn't help the thought of Pansy creeping into my head. I bit my lip.

Harry thought for a moment. "Good," he finally said. Then he walked away, disappearing into the library. I had a brief glimpse of him walking between two aisles, and there was an even taller redhead and a petite brunette following close behind. I smiled, despite myself, and left the area.

My feet led me back to the Slytherin common room, where I found nothing to distract me from my doubts and worries about today. I kept feeling that wrong-ness, and it was nagging at me. Finally I unlocked my room and walked in. There on the wall next to my bed I had tacked the pictures I had in my wallet when I came here. Kelli was up there. I grinned, knowing how much she would freak out if she knew where I was, or who I had just run into. I wondered how she was doing, along with everyone else. My mom and Calvin (my step-dad) were tacked up there. I knew mom would be worried sick. Toby, my kitten, was up there. I missed him terribly. I was suddenly very homesick, but I took comfort in the fact that I would be going home soon. Of course, that's assuming that going home is a comfort.

Soon tears were welling in my eyes. I wanted to talk to Kelli so badly. I wanted to hug my mom. I wanted to hold my cats. I missed Skip and Sandy, Kelli's parents. I missed Tom. I missed all my friends from school. I was ready to go home.

But I had something to take care of first. I was in my room long enough that by the time I left it was time for lunch. I walked up to the Great Hall with my worries from this morning crowding to get my attention. But I wouldn't let them. At least not completely. Yes, I was worrying and wondering, but I had resolved that I wanted my last week here to be a good week, not the horrible one it has started as. So I entered the Great Hall with my head held high. What I saw, though, made my jaw, and my confidence, drop.

Draco was sitting at the Slytherin table, eating his lunch with one arm, and his other was wrapped around none other than Pansy Parkinson.

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hahahahahaha CLIFFHANGER

HAPPY CHRISTMAS/HANUKKAH/WHATEVER ELSE!


	13. Chapter 13

**MERRY CHRISTMAS!

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Chapter 13: Under a Tree

I felt pain before I even thought about what was going on. It felt like my heart was being ripped down the middle. I stood in the entrance, blocking the way for other students, but I never heard their protests. I didn't notice when they pushed me to the side of the door in order to get through. My mind was racing. Why was his arm around her? Her head dropped onto his shoulder as I watched. What was going on? Why wasn't he pushing her away or telling her to stop? Why was he doing this?

I backed up unconsciously until I hit the wall. It was then that I realized that tears were running down my face and some Hufflepuff girl was trying to get my attention.

"Are you alright?" she asked me. I didn't answer. I kept watching Draco, my tears silently falling. I was growing more and more angry and confused and hurt by the moment. Draco was just sitting there. He didn't even know I was standing there. She asked me again if I was all right, but for some reason all it did was make me realize that Draco was cheating on me. He had to be. And I fell for it.

I started shaking my head, and apparently I was whispering "no…no…god please no…" because the girl in front of me said "No? No what?" I slid sideways along the wall. I ran into an intricate metal pole with a torch on top, causing a huge noise. I didn't even hear it; all I knew was that everyone suddenly was turning my way. When the Hufflepuff grabbed the pole to keep it from falling, I bolted. I ran around her, still silently crying, then through the doors. I didn't know where to go. I knew if I went back to the common room, people would be asking questions. Even in my room people would knock on the door to find out. I turned in the opposite direction instead, towards the front doors.

As I grabbed the handle, someone called my name.

"Shayna!" I turned around. It was Draco, of course. "Shayna what's wrong with you?" he asked, almost angrily. The tears started falling faster, and by now I'm sure my face was very wet. I just stared at him. I couldn't believe I had fallen in love with a cheater. I couldn't believe how naïve I had been. I was right, earlier, when I had said he was just another worthless guy. "Shayna?" I pulled open the door and ran out.

My eyes frantically searched for a place to hide. I heard footsteps pound to a stop just beyond the door. Looking, I saw nothing but open yard and the stones for the steps. The door was opening. Wait… the door!

I dashed behind the opening door just as Draco came bolting through it. He ran straight down the steps before stopping. He looked around for me, but never thought to look behind him. I took the opportunity to sneak along the wall and drop behind the stairs with a light thumping noise. I heard Draco's feet slide on the grass, but when his eyes still found nothing, he heaved a huge sigh. Slowly, he dragged his feet back up the stairs. I curled as tightly as I possibly could and hoped he wouldn't see me. Draco's footsteps stopped momentarily at the stop of the staircase. I briefly wondered what he was doing, but then the door opened and his footsteps died away.

Carefully, I peaked over the steps at the door. Draco was gone. Happy I had outwitted him but still pissed, I ran off towards the lake. Though I did not want Draco to see me, I wanted more to be away from everyone in this place.

I stopped in front of a tree right near the bank and purposely put myself out of sight of the front doors. Then, watching my position, I plopped myself on the ground.

It was at this time that I realized I was still crying. Draco had cheated on me. Or at least that's what it looked like. Maybe they hadn't done much, but jesus christ he had his freaking arm around her! That pretty much says there's something going on. But why? He had told me just this morning that he never talks to her anymore. Obviously something changed. What the hell is going on? Am I missing something?

I let out a small noise of frustration. Home was becoming _very_ tempting. What if I just left? Would that save me a whole lot of trouble? I pondered it, but soon realized that yeah, it would save me from I'm sorrys and goodbyes and all that, but I'd regret it terribly. Eventually the tears slowed, and I wiped the last away. I wasn't exactly better, but I had at least stopped crying. For now.

A twig cracked behind me, and none other than Harry walked up to the lake. He squatted near the edge of the water, silently trailing his wand through the surface of it. The squid's giant tentacles made little waves, but Harry didn't seem to notice. Some of his robes dipped in the water, but his attention seemed to be in another place. Then he softly laughed.

I couldn't resist. "What's so funny?" I asked, startling him.

He whipped around, standing fully upright with his wand straight at me. My hands went up in mock surrender. I knew he wasn't going to shoot any spells at me.

"Shayna?" His wand dropped and he relaxed again. "What're you doing here?"

My hands fell as well. "I could ask you the same thing."

Harry grinned crookedly. His eyes wandered back to the lake. "I was just thinking."

More to prevent him from asking why I was there and less out of curiosity, I asked, "About what?"

"I don't know. Everything, I guess." He walked over and sat near me. His arms wrapped around his knees but his eyes remained focused on the lake. "I've been coming here a lot lately. It kind of…calms me, you know? The lake is so calm, so serene, or it looks that way on the surface. Then you go in it and not only is there the giant squid, there's merpeople and terrible weeds and nasty little creatures that would as soon drown you as they would look at you. I don't know… I guess it more takes my mind off everything than it helps me think."

I remembered reading about Harry's adventure in the lake. After the short pause, I decided to steer the subject there. "Harry, what was the Triwizard Tournament like?"

He glanced at me, his eyes thoughtful. "You know about that?"

A small grin flickered to my face. "I know about a lot."

His eyes lingered on me a moment longer before once again returning to the lake. "Challenging. Frightening. Unfair." His expression went sour. "Downright evil, in the end." Oops. Forgot about that. "I suppose you know about that, as well."

"Yeah…" Details and all. Hell, I was there with you. Kinda. You actually lived through it, I just read it.

It was Harry's turn to try and change the subject. "So why are _you_ here?" he said suddenly, his voice a little choked. Obviously the memory of that graveyard was still terrifying for him.

I considered my answer. "Same reason, I guess."

His attention turned to me, which made me a little uncomfortable. I never knew it before, but Harry's got a penetrating gaze when he wants to know something. It kind of reminded me of Dumbledore. "What do you mean?" he said.

"Well…" Once again, I considered what I could say. Instead of blatantly stating the truth, I decided to worm my way around it. "I guess I just wanted to get away for awhile," I said.

"Oh." He looked at me curiously for a moment. Then his shoulders shrugged ever so slightly, and he stood up. "Well, I didn't mean to interrupt your escape. I really should get back to the Great Hall, I left my bag in there when Ron and Hermione started bickering again."

Once again, a faint smile came to my face. "You didn't interrupt. But yeah, you might need your bag."

He looked down at me thoughtfully before saying, "Right. See you Shayna."

He turned and started walking away. "Bye Harry," I replied. In the distance, I heard the Hogwarts bell ring. I heard Harry say "Bloody hell!" before starting to jog up to the front doors.

Then my attention was drawn to the lake. Harry was right. After awhile, it does sort of make you forget everything.

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i SO got a digital camera for christmas. EEK is excited

R&R PLEASE


	14. Chapter 14

maybe this will lessen the anger a little. all will be explained.**

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**Chapter 14: Not Good Enough**

I didn't leave my seat until I heard the last class of Herbology go through the front doors. When they did, I finally abandoned my attempted escape and trudged quickly up the sloping lawn. At the front doors, I carefully opened them and stuck my head in, my eyes on the lookout for Draco, Pansy, or any of their gang. None were around.

I dashed through the doors and across the front hall with no problem. Amazingly, I even made it halfway to the Slytherin common room before I ran into any trouble at all. Of course, I don't know if you could call Mrs. Norris trouble.

Throughout my entire life I have been a cat person, but ever since I've been in this school I haven't been particularly fond of Mrs. Norris. There was just something about her that didn't seem right with me. Still, she was a cat, and since I didn't really go to this school, I had no fear of her.

"Shoo!" I told her when she stopped right in front of me. She turned her little eyes up to me and sat down instead. "I'm doing nothing wrong, go away." Her body twitched, as though she actually considered leaving. "You heard me! Shoo!" I started walking again, and sure enough, Mrs. Norris stalked off.

After that, I made it back to my room with no incident. It seemed everyone was at dinner. Not that I really minded. Soon I was sprawled across my bed, one leg hanging off. I couldn't stop thinking about Draco. Why did he do that? I was so confused. I realized that the lake had calmed me a lot. I wasn't so pissed anymore. I was hurt and confused, but not exactly pissed.

I heard a knock on my door. "Fuck!" I whispered. Okay, maybe I was still pissed. But not at the scale I had been before. Slowly I sat up, hoping against hope that it wasn't Draco, wishing that whoever it was would just go away and leave me in peace. They knocked again. I prayed that they would go away. And I guess my prayers were answered because the knocking soon stopped, and I was once again left in my room with no distractions.

At the moment, my mind was so numbed by the lake that I couldn't really focus. Something about it…it didn't make you forget about life so much, it just kind of put you in a trance to make you unable to stay on one track of thought long enough to be miserable. Or at least that was what was happening to me. Maybe it only affected muggles like that, like some sort of defense against muggles discovering the castle. Like they had at the Quidditch Cup…you know? I definitely don't remember anyone in the books being affected like this. Hell, Harry was _in_ the lake and he didn't come out like this. Harry. He seemed different. I guess since Sirius died he's changed a lot. He seems a bit more open about things, and…I don't know… it's almost like he's more willing to live life or something. I mean, he was always willing in the first place, but now he doesn't want to waste time on Ron and Hermione bickering, and…oh I don't know.

There was another small knock on my door. This one came from a little over two feet off the ground. "Miss Shayna?" a voice asked. Dobby. It was just Dobby this time. I got up and unlocked the door, allowing him in.

"Yes, Dobby?" I asked. He opened the door a crack and slid in before shutting it again quickly. He had a small bundle wrapped in a napkin in his hands.

"Professor Dumbledore noticed Miss Shayna was missing during lunch and dinner." He stepped up to me and lifted his package. "He asked Dobby to bring Miss Shayna some food, in case she was hungry."

I took the napkin-wrapped parcel and opened it. The moment my eyes saw the food I suddenly realized how hungry I was. "Thank you, Dobby. That was very nice of you and Professor Dumbledore."

Dobby grinned, embarrassed by this complement. " 'Tis an honor, Miss Shayna." Then he turned and slipped out my door, much the same way he had entered.

After the door snapped shut I practically attacked the food. I was very hungry, and by the time the food was gone I still had room for more. I sighed, knowing I wasn't going to leave in order to get more food. I decided I'd go to bed. As I pulled my robes off I heard something chime on the floor. I looked down and saw that dreaded vile rolling on the floor underneath me. It had been in my pocket, but I still completely forgot about it. Unhurriedly I reached down and picked it up. It was much the same as it had been earlier, but it felt different to me. Because of this vile, I had four days left before I had to go home, or else make Dumbledore do more work. I wasn't about to do that; I was completely ready to go home. I crawled into my bed, my thoughts still somewhat focused on the vile, but steadily changing to the subject of Draco. Sleepily, I decided I'd find out what was going on tomorrow. Then I drifted off to sleep, the vile still in hand.

The next morning I had a few moments of happiness before the vile reminded me of the day before. I grumbled and got out of bed in a bad mood. I indifferently tossed the vile onto my desk and got dressed, prepared to actually leave. I was starving. And I don't mean like, I'm-very-hungry starving, I mean stomach-ache-no-energy-need-food-NOW starving. I looked at my watch and quickly ran out of my room, through the common room and out into the hallway. It was still rather early, so I figured I could eat breakfast and at least get out of the Great Hall before Draco showed up.

Tears welled in my eyes, but I refused to let them fall. He was not going to have the benefit of knowing how much pain he has caused me. No, sir, not at all. I stubbornly wiped my eyes and marched rapidly to the Great Hall.

Before I opened the door, I stopped and wiped my eyes, just in case there were any tears. Then I opened the door as little as possible and snuck inside. I was immediately grateful that there was not many people in the Hall. I guess it was too early for most students. My eyes involuntarily wandered over the tables. A small smile flicked on my face when I saw Hermione, bushy hair falling over the book she was studying, already halfway done with her breakfast. Right as my eyes reached the Slytherin table, I looked down. That became the second thing I was grateful for. Every Slytherin that was awake had congregated at one end of the table, leaving the other end completely free. I walked over, keeping my head low, and sat at the very end of the table, away from everyone else. I made sure I didn't look over. I didn't want to know whether or not Draco was up and sitting down there. It would hurt too much.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw someone approaching me from the other end of the table. I was worried for a moment, but then they walked behind me, out of my vision. They had looked alarmingly like they had blonde hair…

I lifted a bun to my mouth right as a heard a drawling voice in my ear.

"Shayna," he said. I dropped the bun, and my eyes instantaneously started watering. "We need to talk." His voice actually sounded sad. How DARE he sound sad! He freaking cheated on me!

I turned to face him, one of my legs sitting on top of the bench. Draco straightened, and his eyes actually looked pained. But I didn't care. I was beyond feeling.

"You cheated on me," I said nonchalantly. "With…" I really didn't want to say it. "With _her._" I turned back around and grabbed another bun, trying with all my might to seem uncaring about the whole matter.

"Shayna," he persisted. Then he sat down next to me. I ignored him. He sighed. "Fine. Just tell me something." My eyes wandered in his direction, but I did not look directly at him. "Tell me, why him? You accuse me of cheating, when all I did was hold Pansy. I never went off to the library to snog with her. Why did you have to do that?" Now I wasn't the only one with tears in my eyes. "And with _him_?"

"What?" I asked. What was he talking about? I never even snogged with him in the library, what makes him think I did it with someone else. "What are you talking about?" My voice stopped showing no emotion. I was angry, very confused, and VERY hurt. "And who is 'he'?"

"You know very well who he is," he snapped, the first traces of anger showing in his voice. "You and he have been running off together every moment you get, haven't you? My scar-less forehead isn't good enough for you, is it?"

Wait… "You think I've been running off with _Harry?_?" I asked incredulously. I laughed. "And who told you that?" I was so beyond normal feelings that I thought this was rather funny. A crooked grin was stuck to my face.

"Think it's funny, breaking someone's heart?" he spat out. My grin disappeared. "Pansy tried warning me about you when we started going out, but I didn't believe her. I thought you were a good person. I told her to piss off and leave me the hell alone. Then yesterday she comes up to me and tells me you've been running off with _Potter_, that she's seen you with him, and that you were in the library with him right then. I didn't believe her. You wouldn't do that, I said." At this point I uselessly tried to interrupt, but he just kept going, like he had to say it all. "Then she showed me a picture. She said she had just taken it five minutes before, said she thought about waiting to show me, but felt it couldn't go on any longer. It was a picture of you and Potter, Shayna. Standing outside the library, holding hands." He paused briefly. "How could you do this to me?" he asked painfully before starting to stand.

I was suddenly very reasonable, very practical, and very realistic. My eyes no longer shown with tears and my mouth no longer had that maniac-like grin on it. I was unexpectedly levelheaded.

"Sit down, Draco," I commanded before he was fully standing. Surprised by my reaction to his 'dramatic' speech, he sat. I thought about my first meeting with Harry. "May I see this picture that so perfectly declares me guilty?" Draco hesitantly reached inside his robes and pulled out a very crumpled picture. He handed it to me with hands that seemed unsure of themselves.

I looked at the picture. It was the moment when Harry and I were shaking hands, but the picture was taken at such an angle it looked like we were indeed holding hands. Both of us were smiling, me a bit warmer than him, but as I watched a smile did appear on Harry's face. We started talking, but for some reason we never let go of each other's hands and we never moved.

"Well," I said, "this is some excellent photography by Ms. Parkinson. It does look quite incriminating, doesn't it?" I asked, not really to him.

"You never let go of each other's hands," Draco said desperately. He wanted it to be a lie, and I could tell, but he didn't want to look foolish either.

"Yes I see that." I looked at the picture a bit longer before looking up at him. "Would you like to hear my side of this, or are you going to believe every word of little miss rapist?" I shrugged, the supernaturally reasonable part of me still in control. "Personally, I wouldn't believe even one word out of that mouth, but whatever. Do you want to hear my side?"

Still surprised by my sensibleness, Draco nodded numbly.

"Alright then. After you left the library, I was worried, because you were acting weird. I couldn't help thinking of you and Pansy, so I started freaking out. As I left I ran into Harry. Literally. Knocked the poor kid's glasses off. So, when he got his glasses on, I introduced myself and we shook hands." I handed the picture to him. "That's what's happening here. Whoever took this picture is very good, because they took the picture at such an angle that you can't really tell if we're shaking hands or holding them. After we shook, we had a brief conversation, and we parted." I pointed to the picture. "I don't know how they did it, but we were most definitely not holding each other's hand the whole time and we did not stay in the same place the whole time. I don't stand still like that, and Harry definitely moved."

"So…you're not secretly dating Harry?" he asked, shamefaced.

"No. No thank you. I like blondes." I grinned and ran my hand through his hair. "And I will always like this blonde, in particular. Even if he does do something stupid like believe a rapist." Then I frowned. The emotional part of me was starting to return.

"Shayna…I…I'm so sorry, I swear I didn't do anything with her." He was rambling. I could tell he felt bad, but the reasonableness that had controlled me moments before was starting to disappear. "I just felt so horrible. I needed someone so bad…I needed you so bad…but you weren't there, and Pansy was…and god I feel like an ass right now. I just didn't know what to do and…and I'm sorry." He stopped, waiting for a reply.

"Good," I said. "That helps." I looked back at my plate. "And I'm sorry too, but I don't know if that's good enough."

With that I stood up and walked out of the Great Hall, leaving Draco feeling absolutely dreadful.

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see? he's not a complete ass. just a silly boy in love. R&R


	15. Chapter 15

wow...these reveiws are just pouring in...

note the sarcasm**

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**Chapter 15: The Letter**

Feeling thoroughly miserable, I once again left the Great Hall and walked out to the lake. I wanted to forgive Draco, I really did, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. Not yet at least. I mean, I knew he didn't actually do anything, but I could feel the spot where my heart had ripped at the sight of Draco and Pansy. I knew I wouldn't be able to forgive him until that was healed.

As I sat under my tree, staring out at the lake, I was unsurprised to find my thoughts wandering. I really had no intentions of trying to think of reasons to forgive Draco. I wanted to, but then I didn't. I know it makes no sense, but since when does love make sense? Here I am, madly in love with a man that isn't supposed to exist, known over the entire planet as a fictional character and an ass. But I still couldn't deny the fact that I loved him.

Nor could I deny the fact that he had caused me a great deal of pain.

After about an hour or two, and after much wandering of my thoughts, I decided I'd go back to my room. Everyone was in class, excluding me. Then I remembered where I was. I was in Hogwarts. _Hogwarts._ THE Hogwarts. The Hogwarts that kids of all ages everywhere dreamed of going to, that kids dreamed of period, hoping it was real, hoping they could even catch a glimpse of it's magic. And here I was, barely caring anymore because I was so used to it. I slowed and started looking at my surroundings. The walls were all wonderfully carved, and a person could just tell that this school had survived ages. Instead of walking directly to the Slytherin common room, I took a major detour. I took the time to find the Fat Lady, who was sitting with that really gossipy friend of hers. I waved and kept walking, not wanting to raise suspicion. I made my way through the school, close to getting lost quite a few times. I managed to find a statue that seemed like it should be familiar, only to realize two halls later that it was the statue that held the entrance to Honeydukes. I also found a tapestry that gave me the same feeling of familiarity. Looking behind me, I saw a completely blank wall. I figured I had found the Room of Requirement, but I decided against finding out for sure. I found the large portrait of fruit and again decided against finding out whether or not it was actually the entrance to the kitchens. For a while, my thoughts were lost to the majesty of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.

Then, finally, I returned to the common room. No one was in there, what with one class ended and another started, but I still walked straight through to my rooms. I did not look around after I opened the door; I walked straight up to my dresser thing and picked up the potion I had to drink. In a moment of humor, I wondered how bad it would taste, and I smiled faintly. Only after setting it down again did I spare a look for my bed. There, I did a double take.

Sitting on my bed was a fairly large blue and orange teddy bear with a green and silver bow tie. At its feet was an entire bouquet of red roses. I reached forward and lifted the roses, smelling them gently. They were beautiful. I saw a teardrop land on one petal. I was crying. I knew whom the bear and the flowers were from, even before an envelope appeared in a puff of petals right where the roses had been. Hesitantly, I reached forward and picked up the envelope. 'Shayna' was written very intricately across the front. I let out a sob, and suddenly the bear waddled over and hugged me gently. There was an aura of sparkles around him, so I assumed there was a spell on him making him do that. I wrapped my arm around the bear, and it dropped back into dormancy. I pulled it tighter and set the flowers aside. Then I opened the envelope.

Inside was the most beautiful letter I've ever read in my entire life, and probably the most beautiful letter I ever will read. Draco's spiky handwriting covered six and a half pages. The entire letter covered everything he loved about me, from my laugh to my lips. He repeatedly told me how much he loved me, and even went so far as to put an entire page to how much he loved me. By now I was sobbing. A page and a half was dedicated to how sorry he was for hurting me, how he hated seeing me like that, how he has felt awkward without me being there. I never thought that such breathtaking words could come from Draco. And with every word I read, my heart mended a little more.

At the very end of the letter Draco wrote, "If in your heart you think you could ever forgive me, please come to the Quidditch stadium tonight at eight." I immediately knew I was going. Then, in the biggest writing in the whole letter, Draco told me he loved me in solid caps. I couldn't stop crying. It was just so perfect. I think the bear revived to hug me again, but my arms were wrapped around it so tightly that I don't think it could move.

After a few minutes I stopped sobbing, and awhile later I stopped crying altogether. I set the bear down to put the flowers in a vase that I know hadn't been there that morning. I looked in the mirror and of course my eyes were bright red, but as I watched myself, I saw a smile slowly creep onto my face. Somehow Draco had managed to mend the tear in my heart with his letter.

I missed lunch because of that letter, but I didn't mind. For some reason I thought it better to not see Draco until tonight. I wanted to hug him madly, but I knew I would be able to soon enough. During afternoon classes I made my way back to the giant fruit portrait I had found earlier and tickled the pear, just like I had read. The pear giggled and the door swung open.

(a/n Yes! Dialogue!)

"Miss Shayna!" Dobby yelled, slamming into me in a hug. I guess he was more happy to see me in the kitchens than when he visited my room.

"Er…Hello Dobby," I said. All the other house-elves stopped whatever they were doing to watch me.

"She's a muggle!" I heard one of them whisper to the other.

"How did you know that?" I asked, surprised. Dobby beamed up at me, while the one who had spoken looked stricken with embarrassment.

"Oh, much apologies, Miss Shayna!" it said quickly. "Trinkey meant no offense!"

"Trinkey? Is that your name?" I asked, amused. Trinkey nodded vigorously. "Well, Trinkey, relax. No offense was taken. I'm just curious as to how you knew I was a muggle. I didn't think word traveled down into the kitchen."

"Word doesn't, miss," Trinkey said.

"House-elves have many powers, Miss Shayna," Dobby added to Trinkey's statement. "We can tell how powerful a person is, or if they're a Squib or a muggle."

"Really?" I said, amazed. "I did not know that."

"Most do not," Trinkey replied, giving Dobby a reproving look.

"Would Miss Shayna like anything?" A new house-elf asked me before anything more could happen.

"Well, I did miss lunch…" I answered suggestively. Immediately several trays of food were shoved in my face. When I mentioned off-hand that I would need to sit if I was going to eat all that the house-elves nearly dragged me to a table by the fireplace. There was a small house-elf sitting on a stool, facing the fire. I guessed at who it was by the bottle in her hand and as I sat, I asked Dobby who it was.

"That's Winky, Miss Shayna," Dobby said, disapprovingly.

And then, as if on cue, Winky threw her nearly full bottle of liquor in the fireplace and, in an explosion of flames, jumped off the stool.

"Winky!" Several house-elves exclaimed. "You could have blown up the kitchen!" A few added.

She turned to face the group standing around me. Her face was lit up with determination. "Winky doesn't care. She is going to see Professor Dumbledore," she said with a tone that dared anyone to challenge her.

"What are you going to do Winky?" Dobby asked cautiously.

Winky didn't answer; she just walked out the door. After a moment of stunned silence, I had even more food shuffled in front of me. I ate as much as I possibly could, knowing I would be missing dinner as well, but I still didn't touch at least half of what they had laid out for me.

"I'm sorry…" I said finally. "I can't eat anymore. It was all so lovely, but I am so full."

I heard several things in reply to that. "Thank you, Miss Shayna!" "Don't be sorry, Miss Shayna," and "That's quite alright," were the majority. I looked at a clock on the wall. Just over an hour before dinner. Forty minutes until class was out.

"I should go," I said standing. Only a few loudly objected, Dobby among them. "Dobby, I'll come visit before I go home, I promise," I said, realizing part of the reason of why he didn't want me to leave. After that, they finally let me go.

As I stepped out the portrait hole, my stomach near to overflowing, my heart did a random double beat. And I realized I was ready to forgive Draco.


	16. Chapter 16

okay, just for you. **

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**Chapter 16: Forgiveness?**

I spent the next few hours hiding out in my room, not realizing until it was too late that I would have to leave when other people were chatting away in the common room. I thought a lot in there. But mainly I paced. I think when I finally left there was a little groove starting to appear in the floor. Anyway, at quarter to eight, I took a deep breath--not realizing that I was trembling--squared my shoulders, and stepped out my door. Many Slytherins watched me. Then…oooo then the one person who should NOT have stepped in front of me did. And right then, every eye in the room was on me.

"You have the nerve to step in front of me right now?" I asked, nothing but hatred emanating from my trembling body. Of course, now I was trembling from fury.

"Well, well…little miss virgin thinks she's got what it takes…" Pansy smirked at me, giving me this 'go on, try me' look.

"Actually, little miss virgin doesn't need 'what it takes'"—does finger motions—"for her to live her life. Come to think of it, little miss virgin doesn't need your _shit_ right now." I made sure to accent that.

"Oh! Look at that! She swore!" Pansy was actually surprised by that.

"Listen, you fucking whore, I don't give a damn about you or your little emotional issues. Go see a therapist or something, but stay the HELL away from Draco." Pansy's eyes widened, along with everyone else's. Then she smirked, even bigger, and leaned towards me.

"And if I don't?" She asked threateningly.

I stepped up to her so that I was right in her face. "Then I will personally kick. Your. Ass. Magic or not."

"Oh really?" she replied, not afraid. Stupid whore.

"Really really," I answered menacingly. And then I punched her harder than I could even imagine myself punching someone. She was knocked out instantly.

The entire Slytherin house stared at me in awe. "Anyone else wanna mess with my boyfriend?" I yelled. No one said anything, many actually shook their heads. "Good." Then I stepped over the unconscious Pansy and walked out the door. I wasn't trembling anymore.

I made my way down to the Quidditch stadium at a regular pace. Talking to Pansy had pissed me off, but that punch seemed to get rid of most of the anger. I was almost normal by the time I reached the stadium.

As I walked onto the field I noticed a blonde standing in the middle of the field, staring at the end opposite me. As I got closer I quieted and slowed my steps. Soon I was right behind him.

We both said each other's name at the same time, completely by accident. A crooked grin appeared on my face, and that was the first thing Draco saw when he finally turned around.

"Hi," I said awkwardly.

He didn't answer right away. In fact, he kinda just looked at me for a while. And me being myself, I couldn't look into his eyes for a long period of time. But I could wait for him to respond.

"Shayna…" he eventually said. My eyes found his again. Slowly, as if unsure of himself, Draco lifted his hand up to my face and slowly stroked my cheek. I felt my eyes tear up again. And then he kissed me. It was a very pure, very innocent kiss, the kind with no tongue, the kind that just says, "I'm in love."

"I'm really sorry," he whispered. Then he stepped back and turned to walk away.

"You're leaving?" I asked, my voice choked up from my tears yet somehow sounding surprised.

He stopped and faced me, about two feet away. "Should I not?" he asked innocently.

"I…well…" I stuttered. He turned around and took another step. "I would like it a whole lot more if you stayed," I said suddenly, my voice returning.

He stopped, his foot in midair. "You would?" he asked without facing me. It sounded like…almost like _he _was crying…

I sniffed really loudly. "I would," I answered.

Then he turned and quickly stepped back to me, and before he could wrap his arms around me I saw tears on his face. He wasn't to the point of actually crying yet, but tears had fallen. That made me start crying.

He quickly kissed the side of my head before saying, "I love you Shayna."

I couldn't help smiling a little at that. I snaked my arms up to his head and pulled his face so it was in front of mine. "I love you too Draco. Don't ever forget that." I kissed his mouth quickly to get my point across.

"Never," he replied. Then my arms went around his neck and we just stood there, hugging, for quite a while, in complete silence.

Long before we moved our tears dried up. And when we finally did move, all we did was shift so Draco could conjure blankets for us, then we laid on the ground in the middle of the stadium, still holding each other.

I could tell Draco wanted to ask me something, but he couldn't spit it out. I had a shot of patience and waited for him to say something. And finally, he did.

"Does this mean…we're okay?" he asked cautiously.

I thought for only a moment before replying, "Yes, I think so."

He kissed the side of my head again. "I love you baby," he said.

I smiled and turned my head towards him. And you know how they say make up sex is always better? Well, I wouldn't know about that, but it's definitely true for the cuddling…and kissing…and other things...


	17. Chapter 17

omg reveiws! **

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**Chapter 17: Good-bye**

The next day Draco and I spent all day together. We decided I would go home that night, considering the potion was only good for another day and a half. We made out, yes, but we also just spent a lot of time holding each other in silence. Draco went to his first class that morning—Transfiguration—and then spent the rest of the morning out by the lake with me. I wasn't exactly approving of his skipping, but he flat out told me that no matter what he'd be with me. We went swimming a little, but most of our morning was spent with him leaning against a tree and me sprawled between his legs, his arms wrapped around me. I've never felt as safe as I felt in his arms. And his hugs…better than Nick's, even. I just wanted to sit that way forever.

But soon lunch came, and I had been listening to Draco's stomach grumble for quite awhile, so we walked off to the Great Hall. Many people looked at us in amazement, but we ignored them. I ate lunch for the last time at Hogwarts with one of Draco's arms wrapped around me.

After lunch I made Draco go to Care of Magical Creatures because I knew for a fact that Hagrid was going to give Draco a detention if he skipped another lesson, and I did not want to be the cause of that. For once, Gryffindors did not have Care of Magical Creatures with Slytherins, so I went to say good-bye to Harry, and Ron and Hermione as well. They all wished me luck, and then I went down to the kitchens to see Dobby. He cried… I tried reassuring him but it just didn't work. Then I mentioned that maybe someday I'll see him again, and he got so excited I was afraid he'd wet himself.He didn't, so I left a perfectly dry but sad house-elf in the company of his friends, including Winky who apparently had decided that she was disgracing the house-elf name by not working and was now working twice as hard as Dobby even. I was sent back to my room with loads of food.

While waiting for Draco to return, I packed what little things I had. I put all my pictures away, put my old (cleaned) clothes back on. I debated keeping the robes and decided against it. I did grab a cloak though. It was one that Draco had given me, and it still smelled like him. I wondered if there was a spell to make it always smell like that…

I rummaged through the drawers to see if I had forgotten anything. I found the feather that Dumbledore had let me keep what seemed like ages ago. I put it bythe letter, right next to my teddy bear. The roses were just as beautiful as ever, but I only wanted to take one. It too was laying on my bed. I avoided thinking about what I would miss most when I took the potion, but it was nigh impossible, especially when he walked in my door. He skipped off Double Potions that afternoon, telling Snape he felt terrible, and we pretty much made out the whole time. I think though that we made out because we wanted to distract ourselves, not cause we were horny. Okay horny might've had something to do with it, but not much.

Before we left for dinner I asked Draco about the smell spell, and he obliged with a wicked grin. He thought it would be funny to see my mother trying repeatedly to wash the smell out when it wasn't possible. At dinner, Dumbledore (being the all-knowing guy we all know and love) said a good-bye speech to me, and when he called a toast, I noticed almost every person raised their glass to me. I felt quite appreciated. I barely ate anything, and neither did Draco. We both knew what came next.

After dinner we were probably the last people to leave the table, and we walked slow enough that even if we had left right away we still would've arrived at the common room last. Slytherins greeted us with a sort of mute respect when we walked in, and I noticed—with pleasure—that Pansy was nowhere in sight. We walked into my room and immediately after shutting the door Draco kissed me.

"You don't have to leave," he said desperately, holding me so close I could feel his breath on my face.

"Yes I do. As much as I don't want to, I do." I kissed him soundly before starting to step back.

Before I got far he pulled me to him again. "Then I'll come with you," he insisted.

"Draco, stop. You need to finish your schooling. So do I." I rested my forehead on his chest. I could feel my eyes stinging. "Don't make this harder. I don't even know if I'll make it through the way it is."

He kissed the top of my head. "Alright. Sorry. I just…"

"I know." I pulled away and lifted up the bear. "Thank you, by the way," I said, cradling the bear in my left arm. I pick up the box and tucked it in my back pocket. The feather and rose went in my left hand.

Then I picked up the vial. Draco wrapped me in a hug again. I felt the tearsspillout ofmy eyes. He helped me drape his cloak over my right arm. We kissed, one last time.

"I love you Draco," I said stubbornly.

"I love you too baby," he replied.

"Don't ever forget," I added.

"Never." He reached out and pushed my hair back.

I popped open the top and the liquid inside turned a sort of blue-ish color. I sighed heavily.

"I'll find a way to come to you," Draco said suddenly. I couldn't bear it any longer. I could feel myself starting to break down.

"Good-bye, Draco. I love you."

"I love you too. Bye."

I flipped the liquid into my mouth. In a blinding flash of lightDraco Malfoy, Slytherin hottie extraordinaire, was gone.

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it's short, but hey there's an epilogue so just R&R!


	18. epilogue

**Epilogue: Home at Last**

Dumbledore's potion was much kinder to me than Tom's fridge had been. With the potion I only had to push my foot back to keep my balance. My right hand flew down to my butt to make sure the letter was still there. The cloak hanging from my arm flapped wildly behind me, but I held tight. The rose and feather both seemed barely touched by the wind. Then, it stopped.

I was standing in the middle of Tom's garage. Everything was exactly has it had been. I could even hear Barb outside talking. I guessed Dumbledore sent me back to the same day I left.

"Shayna sure is taking forever in there," I heard Barb comment.

"I'll go see what she's doing," Kelli volunteered. The sounds of running dogs died off.

Kelli walked into the garage, slightly out of breath after her chase with the dogs. "Oy! What's taking you so…?" She stopped dead. I was crying and she knew it. She walked up to me. "Are you okay?" she immediately asked.

I tried to say yes, I tried to say I was fine, but I knew before the words left my mouth she would see right through it. I told the truth. "No," I said bluntly.

"Shayna, what happened?" She looked at my arms. "Where'd you get all this stuff?" I didn't say anything. She looked me right in the eye. "Shayna, talk to me."

"I…" I couldn't say it. How do you sum all that up?

"Okay…" She quickly glanced around and saw a chair. "Sit," she ordered. I was too depressed to object. Then she knelt in front of me.

"Now, tell me what happened," she requested. I broke down and did the only thing I could think of. I pulled the box out of my pocket.

"Read…this," I said between sobs. She looked awfully confused, but did it anyway. The farther she read, the more her face said "Awww! Cute!" When she hit the ending, I knew she was lost.

Kelli looked up at me, her whole faceabsorbed inconfusion. I couldn't help but laugh at her. "Draco Malfoy? But…" she looked back at the letter.

"Kelli?" I said, finally able to talk.

"Yeah?" she asked, her attention focused on the letter.

"Can we go to my dad's? I havealotto tellyou."

Noticing that I wasn't sobbing anymore, Kelli said, "Yeah you do!" She folded the letter up and put it back in its box. "I'll go tell Barb and Tom you feel sick or something. I'll be right back."

"K." And, within moments, she was back. I thought of reaching for the fridge handle again, but I knew I needed to talk to Kelli really bad.

"Alright, let's go," she said, reaching for me in case I needed help walking or something. Maybe it was for moral support. I don't know.

"Oh, and Kelli?" I pulled out the feather. Again she looked at me in confusion. "This is for you. It's from a certain phoenix."

Then she looked up at me in suspicion. "No way…"

"Way."

"You have a LOT of explaining to do woman," Kelli said, her eyes focused on the red-orange feather in front of her.

I shrugged, knowing that sooner or later everything would be better again.

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alas, we have reached the end. i'm still not sure whether or not there'll be a sequel. i want one, but i don't want to go against the books too much. i might have to wait until the seventh book comes out. maybe. idk.

i'm thinking of starting another ff soon, so keep an eye out for that.

3, greeneyes


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